PUBLISHED: 09:00 21 May 2014
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Cricket is one of those sports that can lead to an unhealthy obsession that bleeds into every area of your life.
If you have played the game for a long time you may begin to exhibit some strange behaviours as the worlds of cricket, home and work all merge into one.
Thoughts can be all consuming. Entire tube journeys can be taken up replaying your latest LBW decision in your head until you miss your stop (but it must have been going down the leg side though surely?).
And the workplace is not immune either. When your manager asks you for a “project update” and your response is “I think the 3rds have 10 at the moment but we should be ok for Saturday” – then you’re in way too deep.
Often cricketers will find themselves immersed in what can only be described as “imaginary cricket” - brief daydreams that take place in everyday life.
Any batsmen would be lying if they said they have never played an imaginary cover drive with an umbrella. Many a leg glance has been played on the way to the train station under cloudy conditions.
And it is not always alone. One of our first team players repeatedly plays late cuts half way through a conversation (umbrella or no umbrella).
Another classic and common example of imaginary cricket involves the fruit bowl at home.
It is universally accepted that if you hold a Braeburn like an off-break it is near enough impossible not to send an imaginary delivery down.
Other factors then come into play. If the carpet is a little spongy you might get some extra imaginary bounce and let’s face it Nan has no chance of playing that kind of delivery. Big turn, bat/pad and caught by the tele, massive appeal, the dog raises his paw and she’s gone!
Chairs high fiving the sofa, curtains going mad.
But be careful not to go too far and give her a send-off though – “Kitchen’s that way Nan, keep walking….”. There’s no need for that.
Another big danger zone for imaginary cricket is the supermarket.
If in the bakery section you pick up a french stick you may find yourself guiding one down to third man or, if fully immersed in a dream world, punching one through the covers for two.
And if your placement is good, between the dairy and biscuit aisles usually, then there should be two runs there, three if you run the first one hard - the shelf stacker’s got no arm.
This is of course all fairly harmless and you can lead a normal life with the above affliction but keep an eye on it. If you start shouting “NO BALL” when you put your arm out at the bus stop - seek immediate help.
*Ilford Catholic play in Divisions 1, 4 and 6 of the Herts and Essex Cricket League.
If you would like to play league or friendly cricket in the local area email firstname.lastname@example.org to find out more.