How to Catch and Keep a Vampire - Diana Laurence

19 November 2009

YOU'VE read all Stephenie Meyers' best-sellers, you've seen The Vampire's Assistant in the cinema, you've got the Buffy and Angel box sets and you're addicted to TV shows True Blood and Moonlight.

So, all you need now is to find out how to attract your very own vampire boyfriend.

Diana Laurence comes to the rescue with How to Catch and Keep a Vampire (£9.99, Sellers), a step-by-step guide to loving the bad and the beautiful.

Laurence is full of amusing anecdotes about her own vampire dating experiences and debunks a number of myths about our blood-sucking friends.

It seems they cannot fly, although they can hypnotise a mortal into thinking they are flying.

The modern vampire prefers to sleep in a bed rather than a coffin and they can enter your home without being invited, although most are polite enough to wait for said invitation.

They don't even have to drink human blood. Apparently, while mortal scientists were discovering penicillin and creating vaccines, vampire scientists were coming up with synthetic blood.

And how do you attract a vampire boyfriend? Well, it helps to believe in them. And wearing a red satin ribbon around your right wrist is a good starter.

Once you've got him, your work really begins.

Laurence points out: "There's more to dating a vampire than sleeping during the day and keeping a crucifix in the drawer."

If you want to find out more, then this funny and inventive book is for you.

- LINDSAY JONES